Cake [A Story]

A daughter is telling her Mother how everything is going wrong: she's failing algebra, her boyfriend broke up with her and her best friend is moving away. Meanwhile, her Mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would like a snack, and the daughter says, 'Absolutely Mom, I love your cake.'

'Here, have some cooking oil,' her Mother offers.
'Yuck' says her daughter.
'How about a couple raw eggs?'
'Gross, Mom!'
'Would you like some flour then? Or maybe baking soda?'
'Mom, those are all yucky!'

To which the mother replies : 'Yes, all those things seem bad all by themselves. But when they are put together in the right way, they make a wonderfully delicious cake!'

God works the same way. Many times we wonder why He would let us go through such bad and difficult times. But God knows that when He puts these things all in His order, they always work for good! We just have to trust Him and, eventually, they will all make something wonderful!

- From an e-mail forward, Author Unknown

Notes

When I was a kid/teen, I was all about writing notes in school with my BFF's. Whether we were talking about what we were going to do on the weekend or about our latest crushes, it was a thrill to get a note, and my pockets seemed to be ever full of the things.

Tonight as we were tucking the kids in and tidying things up, I picked up Abby's shorts to take them to the laundry room. As I tucked them underneath my arm, I felt something in her pocket. Lo and behold, it was a stack of folded up little notes. I have to admit, I felt a little sneaky as I pulled them out and began to unfold them (Aaron peeking over my shoulder). What first grade "secrets" would I discover? Were these the first of many notes that I'm sure will be passed between Abby and her friends?

As I opened them, one by one, I couldn't help but feel a little emotional...

Father, thank you for this precious time in my kids' lives, and help me to truly enjoy every season. I feel so blessed.

Carson's Career Plan

Yesterday, Carson and I were sitting on the couch and talking, as we often do, and I asked him what job he was going to have when he grew up. Without much pause, he said, "I'm going to be a paleontologist and a sports player... and on Saturdays I am going to be a veterinarian." 

Sounds like a plan!

Tired

Sundays are always long days, but finally, the kids are in bed and all is quiet. The past week has been a little crazy with everyone being sick all, and I think Abby was feeling it tonight. Just before bed in the midst of all the "go upstairs and get ready for bed, brush your teeth, etc." routine, she just broke down sobbing. As I went to sit down with her and give her a big hug, she cried and said, "I think I'm just exhasted. All this running up and down the stairs and then I had an extra musical practice today that I wasn't really expecting, and I've just been working so hard. And I'm worried that I won't be able to go to sleep, and then my tooth hurts and I haven't been brushing my teeth as much as I should and I might have a cavity... and I just don't know what to do because I'm exhausted and I just feel like being mad at everybody, but I don't want to, and I want to make good choices, but I feel like all I'm doing is making the bad ones, and I'm just so exhausted, Mommy." I just smiled and hugged her tight and assured her that everyone feels that way sometimes. Then we prayed together and tried to focus on the good things in life for a while.

I can relate all too well. When life gets crazy, I can get overwhelmed, which only leads me to strive and wear myself out more, which leads me to worry and fear, which leads me to sin and anger and flat out exhaustion. What do I do when I find myself there? Where do I go? More often than not, I just do my best to keep carrying everything on my back, trudge on, or just wallow for a while. Tonight was a reminder, though, that I have a Father whose arms are always ready and waiting to hold and comfort me.

I am reminded of my absolute favorite passage in Scripture

Psalm 73

23 Yet I am always with you;

you hold me by my right hand.

24 You guide me with your counsel,

and afterward you will take me into glory.

25 Whom have I in heaven but you?

And earth has nothing I desire besides you.

26 My flesh and my heart may fail,

but God is the strength of my heart

and my portion forever.

Carson's Head

Carson's head has had quite the week.

Last Thursday, he fell of his skateboard and scraped his face next to his eye.

Wednesday, Abby came down the stairs to tell Aaron that Carson had cut his own hair. Sure enough, two big chunks were cut out of his hair. Aaron told him that we were going to have to shave his head. He cried and cried as Aaron buzzed his hair. Aaron told him, "Don't worry, it's gonna grow back." To which Carson replied, "But yours didn't!"

Then the next night as Carson danced around the living room, he busted his head open on the window seat.

Poor little guy. :)

Carson

Carson,

This is a look at your life at 4 years old.

You Love:
- Playing games on the iPod
- Your Mommy and Daddy
- Abby
- Cars
- Falling, flipping, dancing, jumping...
- Cherry Cokes
- Watching TV
- Blankie
- Snuggling
- "Double" Hugs and Kisses
- Your cousin Jack-Jack
- Chicken Nuggets
- Mushroom Pizza (?!)
- Guitars (a.k.a. "Rock Stars") and Drums
- Quoting movies

You do not love:
- Cleaning your room
- Not being able to watch TV
- Ants

One thing (among many) that I love about you:
I love that you are always giving compliments and are very sweet. Like yesterday when I was leaving for a shoot, you ran out to the car and said, "I love you, Mommy! I hope you have a great night. And you look so pretty like you always do, and I hope you stay safe, and I love you, and I'll see you when you get back!"

Carson, words I use to describe you include:
affectionate, passionate, fearless, athletic, strong, adorable, funny

Some words that describe how I feel about you are:
excited, proud, love, special, buddy

I love you, and I can't wait to see what God does in you this year!
Mommy

Easter 2010

Today was a great day. It started off a little rough when I spent the better part of an hour looking all over the house for the new sandals that I bought yesterday to go with my Easter dress. I dug through trash, searched every corner, in the back yard. Finally had to go to church wearing black sandals that DID NOT match. As frustrated as I was, I decided to keep things in perspective and not ruin the celebration of our risen Savior over a pair of shoes. (Felt like an idiot when we got home tonight and I found my sandals under a throw pillow on the couch!)

Church this morning was powerful. I don't think I've ever been a part of such a great Easter service. The experience from beginning to end was excellent, moving, inspiring, beautiful, and rich with the presence of God. I meant to take my camera, but the shoe incident caused me to forget. Had a good time during youth with my high school girls small group. We somehow managed to connect Harry Potter to the story of Jesus in a somewhat strange, but relevant way. I did have to try very hard to stay on topic at one point when a debate about Harry Potter vs. Twilight broke out. (But while we're on the subject -- and someone will probably stone me for saying so but -- Harry Potter is in a totally different league than Twilight.) All that to say, our time at church this morning deeply impacted both Aaron and I.

After church we went through the drive-thrus at both Taco Cabana and Wendy's (I never go two places). But today. I felt like a bad mom/wife/person doing fast food on Easter, but I didn't have the energy to cook. Planning ahead is on my agenda for next year's Easter lunch.

The next couple hours, we sat around and totally vegged. Aaron played Madden on the Xbox. Carson took a nap. And Abby and I swung (swang? swinged?) on the swingset in the back yard. Then went shopping. Then headed over to Jason and Natalie's for Easter dinner.

We had a great evening with friends and family, eating ungodly amounts of food, laughing, talking, and celebrating. It was great! The kids also got to have an Easter egg hunt, and Abby was lucky enough to be the one to find the coveted golden egg with $5 in it. Carson was thrilled that he found an egg with four quarters in it and was convinced that was WAAAY better than (or at least just as good as) a $5 bill because there were four of them. We all had a lot of fun. Thank you so much to Natalie and Jason for your amazing hospitality, both today and always!

All of the following phots were taken by Abby this afternoon. I let her take my old D70 over to Jason and Natalie's to take pictures. She did pretty well! She told me in the car on the way over there, "I'm gonna start saving up my money so that when I'm 10, I can buy me a camera like this [a DSLR]." It made me smile.









Abby PROBABLY didn't take this picture. I guess she handed the camera off to Mackenzie or one of the other girls. :)


Here are some other favorites from this afternoon taken by Sandy...

Carson LOVES his Poppy! I love this picture :)


All the girls


Aaron and Reagan :)

Well, it's out there now...

Today was a bittersweet.

Nine years ago, I came to San Antonio to spend the summer at River City as a youth intern. I spent that summer getting to know some of the coolest people I'd ever known. There was something different about River City. I couldn't quite put my finger on it, but I felt it. Summer came and went, and I found myself not wanting to leave. So I stayed, went to school, worked, and continued to work with the youth. Many things have changed since then (like getting married, having kids, and becoming the youth pastor's wife), but in a lot of ways they haven't. I've been involved with youth basically since I was a youth, and it's been so cool to watch students grow throughout the time I've been involved.

Today, though, is the beginning of a new chapter for us. We announced to our teenagers that at the end of this school year, we'll be stepping down and moving on. There were tears. It's hard stepping down at a time when things are going so well.

At the same time, I'm excited, because we've been given a new mission. Aaron and I will be launching a new multi-site on the Northwest side of San Antonio and we're thrilled.

How did this come about? Well, it started last summer. In July, Aaron had some time to himself while driving from Bastrop to San Antonio one afternoon and he just began to sense God telling him to get ready for the next step. He wasn't sure what that looked like. Are we supposed to go to another church? Was his role within the youth ministry about to change? He didn't say anything to anyone (not even me) but just tucked it away. Over the next number of months, he continued to hear the same thing, still not completely sure what he was supposed to do, but he began to become passionate about the idea of the multi-site, like we have in New Braunfels. But still, he said nothing...

Until one day in November (or was it December?), we loaded the kids up in the car, got Starbucks and were driving around looking at Christmas lights, and I looked over at him and said, "I feel like God is telling us to get ready for the next step."

He stared at me, wide-eyed. (I took this to mean that he thought I was crazy.)

After a long pause, he said, "Well, what do you think that looks like?"

"I don't know, really. I don't think we're supposed to leave River City. And I don't think we're supposed to plant a church. I don't know, but I think it'd be really awesome to launch a new campus."

Another long pause. This time I was sure he thought I was crazy.

But then, the most amazing thing happened. He said, "Wow. I've been feeling the same thing." Then we were both quiet.

For the rest of the night, though, and over the coming days, we found ourselves lost in conversations about what God had been saying to each of us individually over the past number of months, and the excitement built as we realized that the hand of God had been guiding us individually, but very much together, all along. The ideas and the possibilities were overwhelming and thrilling, and we just knew this was where we were being called.

God has continued to confirm this every step of the way. As we approached Sean and the church leadership, we found that God had been moving in them too, and doors have continued to open.

Today, we were finally able to announce this new ministry to the youth and to the congregation, and I can't wait to see how things continue to unfold from here. We're so excited to see the team of people God puts together and all that He has in store. Please pray for us as we begin this journey! We'll keep you posted along the way!

Thanks for being a part of our life. Sorry for the super long post with no pictures. :)

"Pleazy Sweetie Hearts?"

Carson is a little stinker. And he makes me laugh pretty constantly. Lately he's been doing this thing where he'll ask for something he really wants, and if I say no, he puts on his sweetest little smile and says, "Pleazy sweetie hearts?" It is SO cute. (Not cute enough to make me change my mind, of course, but cute nonetheless.)

This morning while I got my last few minutes of sleep, Abby and Carson got out their boxes of markers, etc. to color and when I got up, I found this...

Carson said, "Mommy look! I'm all decorated for church!" He had stamped himself all over and was smiling very proudly. (This picture was taken post getting in trouble, so the proud smile is gone.)

This boy is something else and he makes life very interesting. :) He loves falling down and imitating all sorts of people, animals, sculptures... you name it. He's very affectionate and is good for a snuggle any time of day.

I'm so thankful for my little boy!

My Little Worry Wart

Abby has been in this phase lately where she worries... about... EVERYTHING.

Every day, we are asked a million questions that always begin with "What would happen if..." and seem to usually end with "Would it kill me?" For instance, this morning, she wanted a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I informed her that we were out of peanut butter. She then suggested that perhaps just a jelly sandwich would be delicious, to which I replied that it might not be the best idea. "Why? Would I die?"

A minute ago, I picked up an egg roll and broke it in half and handed it to her. Just prior to that, I had rinsed my hands off at the sink. Before she would eat her half of the eggroll, she said, "Did you just wash your hands? Did you use soap? Are there any chemicals on your hands?"

The other day, she walked into my room, very concerned and said, "How hard is it to break your fingers off?" She was extremely worried because she had been playing with Carson and his fingers "cracked" and she thought his finger was going to fall off.

A couple days ago, I picked her up from school and she had put hand sanitizer on her hands and then on her lips. I told her not to, that hand sanitizer was just for hands. I then had to spend the next 30 minutes convincing her that she was not going to be deathly ill because of it.

It's a little bit funny... a little bit exhausting... :) Is this a normal phase?! How do you teach kids about not worrying. So far it's mostly health related, and hopefully all of her questions are born more out of curiosity than fear. But I know how gripping worry and fear can be and I hope that we're able to show her that she can trust God in ALL things big and small.

Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?
Matthew 6:27

Christmas Day 2009

Christmas Day was wonderful this year. I love Christmas Day because the whole world pauses, and everything seems quiet, if only for a day. We woke up Christmas morning (BEFORE our kids), made coffee and got the camera ready, etc. Then the kids got up and discovered that Santa had brought them each a brand new bike. They immediately hopped on and drove the bikes around the living room and Carson was singing, "I love it! I love it! I really, really do!" It was adorable. A few minutes later, Ammie and Poppy (Aaron's mom and dad) arrived and the present opening commenced. It was really fun this year with the kids being old enough to really get into it all. Abby was thrilled about her Hannah Montana wig. Other highlights were Operation, a Lite Brite, and beads to make necklaces with. Carson actually squealed when he opened up Mater (from Cars), and he also loved his game, Legos, and his "rock star" (i.e. guitar).





After opening presents, we enjoyed breakfast and a leisurely morning before heading over to Ammie and Poppy's for the afternoon. In keeping with tradition, Aaron made his delicious prime rib (covered in proscuitto, I might add). Amazing. Jason, Natalie, Jackson, and Reagan were (of course) there as well and we had an awesome time. Lots of good food, laughter, and great memories, as always. I have to say that I am just so thankful for wonderful in-laws. From day one, they have loved me as one of their own, and I couldn't feel more blessed to be part of such a wonderful, amazing family.



This picture of Abby cracks me up. She looks a little rough. :)







I love this picture of Poppy opening their record player --> mp3 converter. :)


Carson loved his monogrammed Cars pillow that Aunt Natalie and Uncle Jason gave him!




And this just goes to prove that no matter how much money you spend, it's always the boxes that they love the most!

Halloween 2009

It all started Friday afternoon when I walked out into the front yard and saw Aaron pulling in the driveway with "Grilliath". We had planned on having some neighbors over on Halloween and cooking out in the front yard, but this was overkill. I rolled my eyes and was slightly embarrassed at the grill the size of our driveway, but Aaron assured me. If we wanted to reach out to our neighborhood, nothing will draw people like a giant grill.

Turns out he was right. We had a great night last night hanging out with family and neighbors. We set up a "jumpy castle" that Jason and Natalie brought and everyone had a great time! We gave out tons of candy, hot dogs, and burgers and met lots of new people who were completely taken aback that complete strangers would invite them to hang out and have a hot dog.

When it got dark, we took all the kids out trick-or-treating and, needless to say, they had a great time. Abby, for the past month or so, had been planning on being a doctor, but she decided last minute (literally) that she wanted to be a princess. And Carson was a jack-in-the-box. He enjoyed singing the little song and then popping up and saying "Wa-Puff!" (Not sure where he came up with that sound, but it was cute.) I was cracking up at Carson, who after we had been trick or treating a while, he just stopped and said, "Mom, I have all the candy I need right here. I'm not going to get any more." I was shocked and decided maybe he was just tired, but he patiently walked from house to house with us as the other kids ran to get more candy. Later on, I said, "Carson, why don't you go up to the door at this house," to which he replied, "Mom, I told you I don't want any more candy!" Not long after that when we got home, he said, "Can I please go to bed now?" Who are you and what have you done with my son?

He was back to his usual self this morning though. When I woke up he had already had at least two pieces of candy and was getting into more.


At any rate, it was a great night. Thanks to Bill and Sandy, who took pictures of the whole thing! I was being lazy. :)

Carson [September '09]

Every now and again I try to write down all the things about my kids that I may someday forget. Right now so many of these things seem so normal, but I'm becoming all to aware of how quickly my kids change as well as their likes and dislikes. So here's a little snapshot.

Carson...

...loves playing drums, guitars, and singing with Jackson. He wants to be a drummer when he's "big".

...his favorite songs are "Mighty to Save", "Last Dollar" by Tim McGraw, and "You Never Let Go" by Matt Redman.

...loves falling down.

...plays "Sonic" in the bathtub.

...always makes up words (like "Nupie" - used as both a name and an exclamation, neither good or bad, as in "Hey, nupie!" or "Give that back, nupie!")

...loves watching TV

...loves playing in the back yard

...loves his cars/trucks/trains

...is always talking about all the things he is going to do when he gets older.

...enjoys being in his underwear. I swear I get him dressed in the morning, but as soon as we get home, he takes off his shirt and shorts and says, "I am underwear man!"

...loves getting to ride in his daddy's truck. He gets so excited.

...and, of course, he is still super attached to his animal blanket!

Superman's Identity Crisis

This morning after we dropped Abby off at school, Carson randomly declared, very matter-of-factly, that "Mom, I really AM Superman."

He was pretty thrilled at this idea.

Later on this morning, he came along with me to be my "helper" when we went to take Reagan's one year portraits with Natalie. As we were packing up, I couldn't help but snap a picture as Carson grabbed Reagan's tutu and declared he was going to dress up as a "pinata". Gotta hand it to the kid, he's creative!

I'm still laughing. This picture cracks me up. :)

Charlie and Lola [Favorite Things]

I love that I have a job where, if need be, I can take a few minutes out of my day to watch the cutest cartoon ever. (I chose to post the one about guinea pigs because the kids as of late have been obsessed with them and they want to have two "skinny pigs" -- as Abby used to call them -- one named Bugsy, like the one from Bedtime Stories, and one named Brittney.)

The Park

Carson and I decided to get out of the house for a while to play -- no work, no errands, just fun. So, of course, we headed over to the park where Carson played like he was a giant robot and I sat down with a coke and a book (The Count of Monte Cristo). It was relaxing. I needed that.

It's been kinda fun having just Carson at home during the week. I had a couple years of having just Abby before he was born, and I'm excited about having some special time with just him before he heads off to school in the next couple years.

The other day, we were in the car running errands and he was cracking me up talking about all the things he would be able to do when he was a grown up -- use scissors and knives, walk by his self without a mommy, call Jackson on the phone and say, "Hey man, what's up? How's it going, dude?" It made me laugh.

Quotes to Remember: Date Night

Me: Carson, where do you want to go on our date night tomorrow?
Carson: Starbucks. And maybe pizza.
Me: Anywhere else you'd like to go that's maybe not food?
C: Mmm... Sonic.
Me: Okay, after we get food and drinks what do you want to do?
C: Let's go grocery shopping.

Quotes to Remember: Hyper

Yesterday Abby came home and was bouncing off the walls. Aaron told her, "Settle down a little bit," to which she replied...

"Daddy, I'm not being hyper, I'm just being FUN." :)